Men's Rules For Women:
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're
a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving
it down!
1. Sunday Sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides... Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear
on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers,
to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you
want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your
girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible
in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and Void
after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably
are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted
two ways and one of the ways makes you sad
or angry,
we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, please
just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever
you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and
neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows
default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched...
We do that!
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not
worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an
answer to,
Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere,
absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really!
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about,
unless you are prepared
to discuss such topics as baseball or motor
sports.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round is a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch
tonight.
But did you know... men really don't mind
that?
It's like camping.
Pass this to as many men as you can - to
give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can -to
give them a bigger laugh